Living my magic

No matter the circumstances, the situations in life, the haves or have nots, happiness or sadness, completeness or incompleteness - anything, something, nothing or many things - everything is irrelevant. It just doesn't cut it, nothing, just nothing. 

It all seems distraction - money, fame, relationships, family, friends, hobbies, responsibilities, emotions - everything. They have no value, nothing at all. 

At this moment, I feel as if I am standing at a peak with snow falling on my face, as I strech my arms with my face looking at the sky to enjoy the snowflakes falling on my face - that cold touch without any presence of anyone feels ultimate. And yet, at that moment too, despite no one with me physically and despite the cold weather, I feel warm, there is a liquid warmth that just melts inside me and a musky warmth that engulfs me physically from outside. I am one with nature and nature is within me. 

And I realise, it has always been like this. I never knew why I had instantly fell in love with "Wuthering Heights". It's an absurd love story, which made no sense. Yet, I loved it, and defended Heathcliff with so much passion. This line forever etched into my memory - "I am Heathcliff." That definitive declaration by Catherine shuddered me. 

Yet, today, as I picture myself on the top of that snowy peak, all alone and yet not so alone, finally I could describe my exact feelings, albeit in borrowed words - "He is more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same. If all else perished and he remained, I should still continue to be, and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger. He’s always, always in my mind; not as a pleasure to myself, but as my own being."

This life had been great. And there is still a lot to come and I am living my magic ✨