Ready for a crazy ride?

I am just shaken, pretty much, but I know I am strong and will get through this too. But, all this is not easy to ignore. I knew something was coming, there would have been a pivot, I felt it, and what happened, shook me to my core. 

Everyone is telling me that I am good, I am fine and that I shouldn't worry, but I am not convinced. No one gets what I feel, they never did, so why expect now as well. 

Just that, this time around, it feels as if my foundation has shifted, everything has just vanished into a quicksand, and yet, strangely enough I am standing still, don't know on what, but I am. I have somehow survived this destruction around me. I feel naked, bare, more from a soul's perspective. I see myself in this barren and ravaged land, standing all alone, shaky, everything in grey and white. Yet, this doesn't feel like an end, it feels as if this is the end of something that was long coming and I just need to stand at that ground, hold myself strong and wait for the dawn. I can see the flicker of light and I know that the new day will bring enough nourishment to make everything green and colorful. I believe in that. And, believe it or not, I still believe in myself, more than before. 

It feels like a battle won. I still don't  know what it is, and I still don't know why I write here, but somehow I feel things will start making sense soon. 

And, I know I am in for a crazy ride. So asking, you in?